Have you ever actually stopped and looked at the people you really like that are in your life? There is a sense of yourself in them that mirrors back at you. It feels familiar, it feels safe, it feels great. The same happens with people who intensely irritate us, make us feel angry or rub us up the wrong way.
The only reason they have an effect on us is because it is something within ourselves we are not acknowledging or cannot admit that we have the potential to be all things simultaneously to. When we face what it is we don’t like in another, when we look at what it is trying to tell us, we can integrate it, shift past it and once again feel more balanced.
Through our upbringing and shaping into who we are, we have preconceived ideas on who we are and on who everyone else in our lives should be.
It is when we do not perform to these expectation levels, we cause ourselves great anxiety. If others do not perform to our ideas of them, it to causes pain and possibly anger. Only when we are willing to break down these expectations and rules for ourselves and others, we are more free to create new stories, new ways of being for ourselves. Self limiting beliefs fall away and pain that we create from existing paradigms can also be released.
The process can be painful and we cannot hide from it. We need to be brutally honest with ourselves the entire process and always look back within ourselves instead of pointing the finger and externalizing and blaming others for our downfalls, mistakes or pain.
We certainly can have pain inflicted on us by others but we can ultimately choose to carry it or with the help of a facilitator, let it go through a gentle process and at the pace you are willing to release.
Thanks for reading,